office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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