You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm always down for nudity.
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