Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Randomize