she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
