hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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