I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
