you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
