Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
