HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize