No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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