FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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