hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Your dad touched me again.
pop tarts are not kleenex
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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