they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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