oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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