I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize