I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
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