awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
