If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
