If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize