Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
