i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
