You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
If its not for food we ain't going out.
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