awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
