dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
ok first of all what the fuck
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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