3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Someone signed my nipple.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
