And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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