It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
