I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
