I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
These tits shall not be calmed
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
