The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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