Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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