And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
