Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
