I think my vagina is haunted
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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