hotel room ftw
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize
