id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
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You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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