She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
no you cant smoke seaweed
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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