I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
