Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...

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  (603): no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us... http://tfl.nu/rs9m
  Replies (1) Good night (669) Bad night (1069)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.

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  (217): Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it. http://tfl.nu/fcdd
  Replies (23) Good night (926) Bad night (3230)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Why am I in a dog kennel?

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  It was for your own safety

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  (803): Why am I in a dog kennel? (1-803): It was for your own safety http://tfl.nu/w7ni
  Replies (27) Good night (13063) Bad night (1457)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.

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  (702): She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note. http://tfl.nu/7aam
  Replies (9) Good night (4662) Bad night (747)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.

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  (808): He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that. http://tfl.nu/smq4
  Replies (6) Good night (2116) Bad night (925)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Speaking is such a hard concept right now

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  (913): Speaking is such a hard concept right now http://tfl.nu/ohqp
  Replies (3) Good night (1523) Bad night (565)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.

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  (847): no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them. http://tfl.nu/1ayu
  Replies (1) Good night (1400) Bad night (567)
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  (585): View more from New York

  Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered

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  (585): Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered http://tfl.nu/ct7k
  Replies (13) Good night (1348) Bad night (955)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy

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  (617): You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy http://tfl.nu/irre
  Replies (8) Good night (872) Bad night (2586)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday

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  (724): On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday http://tfl.nu/c6y1
  Replies (3) Good night (1346) Bad night (381)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change

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  (702): This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change http://tfl.nu/0eyu
  Replies (1) Good night (831) Bad night (317)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.

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  (270): You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs. http://tfl.nu/j0k2
  Replies (16) Good night (1636) Bad night (361)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.

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  (703): Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck. http://tfl.nu/9cle
  Replies (1) Good night (707) Bad night (377)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed

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  (606): You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed http://tfl.nu/ihu1
  Replies (2) Good night (363) Bad night (205)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.

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  (970): Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background. http://tfl.nu/hf4r
  Replies (1) Good night (169) Bad night (379)

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