Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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