ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize