i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
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his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
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i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.