Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat

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  (313): Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat http://tfl.nu/xnvb
  Replies (3) Good night (898) Bad night (446)
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  (972): View more from Texas

  the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool

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  (972): the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool http://tfl.nu/pe2b
  Replies (13) Good night (577) Bad night (908)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance

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  (801): The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance http://tfl.nu/4nxj
  Replies (10) Good night (4489) Bad night (548)
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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?

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  (808): Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes? http://tfl.nu/1azu
  Replies (2) Good night (708) Bad night (2572)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now

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  (715): You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now http://tfl.nu/q56d
  Replies (59) Good night (7742) Bad night (749)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.

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  (508): Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated. http://tfl.nu/vtpc
  Replies (40) Good night (1371) Bad night (3640)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas

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  (814): he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas http://tfl.nu/93o8
  Replies (13) Good night (1813) Bad night (4666)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.

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  (781): Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him. http://tfl.nu/iiv7
  Replies (15) Good night (8191) Bad night (1097)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.

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  (937): Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not. http://tfl.nu/7iqg
  Replies (9) Good night (4374) Bad night (1258)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.

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  (407): And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword. http://tfl.nu/gcmk
  Replies (21) Good night (8636) Bad night (1030)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.

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  (701): Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically. http://tfl.nu/syut
  Replies (4) Good night (652) Bad night (1317)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.

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  (714): I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters. http://tfl.nu/itk8
  Replies (5) Good night (2804) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (517): View more from Michigan

  She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.

  (1-517): View more from Michigan

  You must be good in bed dude

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  (517): She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family. (1-517): You must be good in bed dude http://tfl.nu/2upq
  Replies (4) Good night (1068) Bad night (462)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?

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  (334): Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex? http://tfl.nu/rvvc
  Replies (23) Good night (1672) Bad night (845)
• Favorite

  (941): View more from Florida

  That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.

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  (941): That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that. http://tfl.nu/m9pn
  Replies (1) Good night (659) Bad night (249)

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