Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
