Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.