I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
