Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
