Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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