Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize
