god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Damn victory sex feels great
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize
