apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
