Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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