So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
